Sunday, October 23, 2005
let me think what to blog about.
okay, yay half term!
jos and i are trying to devise a way to play matchmakers.
my sister thinks i must do my best and help j too because i am too evil and i need some good marks so that i can uh, go to heaven.
(or to the big house, depending on which way you imagine the afterlife to be)
hee hee, ignore that last bracketed bit.
it just amuses me to talk about it.
so we were talking strategy.
oh my god, Jordan's bikini-ed body is distracting me.
everytime i see her picture on the magazine cover, my train of thought goes off the tracks.
but anyway, i digress.
well, have not actually come to anything concrete.
we're dealing with some hard nuts here.
aye ):
watched Corpse Bride yesterday.
was so cute!
i love Johnny Depp.
watched Lord of War on friday.
really good too, if a bit morally ... questionable.
just made me a bit sad.
the world is such an evil place.
and there's nothing we can do about it.
):
mm, methinks am not as horrible as everyone thinks.
tee hee.
reading The Pact now.
v v nice book about a suicide pact between childhood sweethearts.
very emotional rollercoaster-ly.
but so goddarned sweet.
that is, if you discount the fact that the girl shot herself in the head and the boy got indicted for it.
murder in the first degree, no less.
but no matter.
i'm quite sure he's gonna get off in the end anyway.
it was the girl who had issues.
boy, did she have 'em issues.
overflowing with issues.
going to Brighton on tuesday.
cannot wait (:
am supposed to help j caption her pictures.
i don't want.
she's reading The Prodigal Daughter now.
reminds me of p5, my mom, and my dad especially.
we're all such Jeffery Archer fans.
ha ha.
need to change some hoodies later.
don't feel like walking to town.
lazy sundays are nice.
it's getting colder.
been raining bloody felines and canines every night.
so i go to sleep listening to all that rain pattering outside.
love the sound of rain, better than any sleeping pill on a good night.
and on bad nights, it just makes me so high i can't sleep.
but it's a happy kinda can't sleep.
so (:
got some funny interview course today which i totally didn't pay for so i don't know how come they put me down.
aye ):
give me more problems only.
please let this day pass fast.
yay, half term.
i'm in holiday mood already.
didn't study last night.
instead spent the whole night writing about 10 pages of godknowswhat in my diary.
so cannot make it, i can't seem to stop bitching.
this is terrible.
i'm never going to start on my journey on sainthood.
ha ha, nevermind.
today is a new start.
(:
i don't want to go for the interview thing.
waste my time only.
have decided that am nasty person, and therefore need to un-nastify myself.
that came about from self-evaluation fit No. 1054.
so i resolved not to say or do nasty things anymore.
and then ... i said some nasty things.
but no matter, i will start again today.
omfg, xiang said i was evil yesterday.
(as in really, "U are evil." wtf)
and that i should "repent at least 3 times before u (i) die."
so blunt, that nasty fellow.
but he's a stupid cow, so i don't really care.
i thought that was amusing.
laugh with me!
-giggles.
looking forward to seeing charlotte online later.
have to spice up my life through her's, if you know what i mean.
oh ... but no bitching.
for i am saintly.
ha ha ha.
raging hormones at 17 is no joke.
they fuck you up so bad.
pun fully intended.
i tremble to think of self at 17.
what if i develop an infatuation on someone?
very bad, that would be.
ah, 16, don't leave me.
really do think that must be a better person.
or karma will come toy with me again.
and god knows what will happen to me then.
methinks j's incarceration has got me thinking about mortality.
oh lord, give me strength.
aiight, am supposed to be doing some last minute mugging since i'd somehow managed to slack off the whole of yesterday.
am currently patting myself on the back for being smart and not going for paintball.
i mean, nothing seemed stupider than to pay good money to run around like dogs and get dirty.
but ah, i've come to realise that there're stupider things to do than that.
that's to actually go for the damn event.
so anyway, j my life coordinator is currently residing in hospital.
aftermath of paintballing.
(i know, who would've thought paintballing would have such repercussions right)
some hugely fractured arm, and surgery to correct it.
you just can't do anything here.
even the seemingly most innocent activites can have you ending up dead.
but okay, talked too much already, now have to get off of there and go to talk with my very good friend, whos good looking, smart, funny, and in black today! -----> anthony!!! :D hehehehe
that was anthony.
anyway, talked to j on the phone.
was so horrified at the news when i heard her voice, i just about died in relief.
she's a happy one, that one.
she was like, "HELLO LEE."
and i was like, "OMG, ARE YOU STILL ALIVE?"
and she giggled.
she's too happy for a patient.
such optimism.
such insouciance.
such .. joie de vivre.
have to admire the happiness in that one.
if it were me, i'd
1) be convinced that was dying
2) convince everyone that i'm at death's door
3) bemoan my sad state in life, passionately. again.
4) get lots of sympathy and milk it for all it's worth.
5) complain and whine endlessly.
yeah, that's what i would do.
must teach j to be more like that.
it's a woman's prerogative, afterall.
all my friends are mutating.
they are turning into huge shockers, them all.
and me, i just keep getting more and more .. shocked.
):
so then here's poor lee.
boring and dry like mary jane.
just going to school everyday.
no current paramours.
no raging hormones to speak of.
ayep, that's bloody depressing, that is.
is everybody going on to some teenage phase that i have yet to discover?
because LET ME JOIN THE CLUB!
-wails.
i wanna be in.
):
you know, then at least i can have a more hoppity life.
even if i mightn't like it very much.
but ... gah.
i need some excitement.
ha ha, i need to go home and do something like ... cool.
like charlotte's masterplan.
unfortunately, home is a year away.
aiyoxX, y liddat arhX?
):
lians are such interesting creatures.
jos and i had quite the time of our lives giggling over friendster accounts on saturday.
and now, saying, "nvm. hahaxX!" just cracks us up like mad.
it's just one of those things that doesn't sound funny at all when put in words.
so no, do not sneer no matter how lame that sounds.
it was hilarious at that moment, okaaay.
and i'm quite convinced my brother has some chao lian girlfriend.
must start spying on that one.
(:
aye, i got my EPS correct, then i cancelled it out and put a wrong answer.
accounting always makes me doubt myself.
):
but anyhow, yay!
(:
i've got nothing much to say.
all i've been this past two weeks is boring and angsty.
so, oh well.
anyway, BIG SMILE!
i'm grilling charlotte on msn now.
ooh, i love this.
aiyo, so harassed.
):
i hate UCAS.
nasty fuckers.
yesterday was a harassed day and i felt bloody sick.
but had nice tantrum/bitch fit with j, that helped a bit.
aiyo, my heart hurts.
i keep thinking about the UCAS ):
what's the problem now?!
-hops.
oh ya.
asdfghjkleredhdhdjd!!!
@#%^$&*!
):
that's lee code for something that made me very grarrrrrr.
-huffs.
scoffing bailey's haagen-dazs now.
i need the alcohol, i do.
but, oh well.
i'll just have to settle for the nearest alternative, eh?
j's uploaded pics!
i'm gonna steal them.
and caption them, because j is a lousy captioner.
ha ha, i hope i have the tenacity to caption properly.
short attention span = lousy captioning.
(:
why does my life feel so screwed?
i need a religion.
some spiritual well-being may be just what i need at the moment.
):
anws, on a happier note, had nice conversation with the rest yesterday about facial features and what looks good, and what complements what.
my favourite kinda topic (:
it's like the old days, though admittedly, not the same.
i think i should be a plastic surgeon.
and if i wasn't such a retard at chemistry, i just might've.
oh well.
it's just me and the law now.
no, that didn't make me happier.
i still feel harassed.
GAH!
shoot me, i want to die.
personal statements and UCAS ought to be banned for causing me so much pain.
and now, i'm perusing the law quotations my dear mommy sent me to see if they can be incorporated in my personal statement.
aiyo, aiyo.
don't know how to crap about them.
and what if they ask me about the quote?
waa, i'll die okay.
i want to pon school.
):
but i haven't ponned for so long already.
my god, i am so out of touch with my old self.
the ponning addict pons no more.
the consummate cheater who doesn't dare cheat anymore.
):
come back to me, me.
ha ha ha, moaning about useless things again.
i wanna be a guy.
things would be much better if i were a guy.
ha ha, i hope.
ARGH, WHY THE FUCK AM I APPLYING TO CAMBRIDGE?!
then must go for interview.
ugh, kill me kill me kill me.
life sucks when you go through all the days on the verge of tears.
... ):
current status: v v Bad.
God help us, for we cannot help ourselves.
):
allow me to reiterate that i really don't like discord.
i've not felt so out of sorts since the last time phoon played all those pissy mindgames on me.
and that was two years ago.
it's out of practice, i am.
ugh.
it's old friends whose habits and tempers i'm used to i'm sticking to from now.
phoon clare bri charlotte, come here and make things better.
ha ha, kill me.
methinks the prolonged period of numbness has gotten me over-reacting now.
still listening to the happy jay chou song.
i really like it.
:D
for the past days, have:
moaned the loss of the ability to stalk people on friendster,
then did many a victory dance when it was discovered that settings can be changed.
yiyang came, and she made me fully envious about uni life.
i so do want a takeshi kaneshiro lookalike in my school.
have also recently realised that i have that jay chou song in my pod that phoon and bri liked.
am v v pleased, and i like it a lot too.
(:
so sweet.
i listened to it on repeat last night till i got so high, i couldn't sleep.
and i didn't sleep till 4 at least.
bless me.
always the chronic insomniac.
yesterday was weirdass.
and current status: unknown.
oh boy, oh boy.
guess we'll know later (hopefully)
ah, it's cold and miserable here.
and i'm looking out, craning my neck, straining my eyes for someone.
i don't like discord ):
no, i don't.
ha ha, whatever.
i feel the need to thank clare bri and phoon for, if not teaching me to feel, at least teaching me to act it consummately.
(:
